A used car checklist you'll actually use

Most used car checklists are ninety items long because ninety sounds thorough. Nobody standing on a stranger's driveway in the rain checks ninety things. What follows is the shorter list: the checks that actually catch the cars people regret buying, in the order you'll use them.

Before you travel anywhere

The cheapest checks are the ones you do from the sofa, and they should kill half your shortlist.

• Run the reg. A history check takes seconds and shows the MOT record, mileage trend, spec, tax position and status flags. Finding out a car has a falling mileage line after a two-hour drive is a self-inflicted wound. Shortlisting several? A multi-check does the lot in one order.
• Read the MOT history properly, advisories and all. There's a guide for that. Repeated advisories are next year's bills, itemised.
• Sanity-check the price. A car priced well under the going rate isn't a bargain, it's a question. Sometimes the answer is "divorce, needs it gone Friday". Often it's a write-off marker the ad forgot to mention.
• Check the ad itself. Photos taken in a supermarket car park, a mobile number that appears in other ads for other cars, a "selling for my mate" story: each one is a seller who doesn't want to be findable afterwards.

On the driveway

View at the address on the V5C, in daylight, ideally with the engine stone cold; ask the seller not to start it before you arrive. A pre-warmed engine is one of the oldest tricks there is for hiding rattly cold starts.

• V5C first. Does the name match the person in front of you? Does the VIN on the logbook match the one at the base of the windscreen and on the door pillar sticker? A VIN that disagrees with the paperwork ends the viewing, politely.
• Panel gaps and paint. Crouch at each corner and sight along the sides. Mismatched gaps, paint texture that changes mid-panel, or overspray on window rubbers all say "repaired", which is only a problem if the seller said it wasn't.
• Tyres, including the dates. Uneven wear across one tyre means alignment or suspension trouble. And every tyre carries a four-digit date code (week/year): "2419" is mid-2019. A budget brand on one corner is normal life; four different brands is a car run on the cheapest possible everything.
• Under the oil cap and dipstick. Creamy mayonnaise under the cap can mean head gasket. Oil that's black treacle means services skipped, whatever the book claims.
• Wear versus mileage. Steering wheel, pedals, driver's seat. If they disagree with the odometer, believe them; the clocking guide covers this in detail.

On the test drive

Insist on driving it yourself, on a route with some speed variety, for at least twenty minutes, long enough for the engine to reach temperature and for warmed-up faults to introduce themselves. Radio off.

• Cold start. Watch the exhaust in the mirror. Blue smoke is burning oil; white smoke that doesn't clear is coolant.
• Brakes, once, firmly. On an empty road, from about 50mph. The car should stop straight, no pulling, no shudder through the wheel (that's warped discs).
• Clutch bite. High bite point plus any smell of hot friction material is a clutch on its way out, a £500–£1,500 job depending on the car.
• Hands loose on the wheel. On a straight, flat road, does it track straight? Pulling to one side is alignment if you're lucky, a bent car if you're not.
• Listen through the bends. Clonks over bumps are worn suspension bushes or drop links; a rhythmic drone that changes when you steer is a wheel bearing.

The paperwork, then the money

Back inside, take your time; a genuine seller expects this part.

• Service history: stamps or invoices with mileages that climb sensibly. Ring the last garage if anything feels off; it's a two-minute call and clockers hate it.
• Every key. Replacement keys run £150–£400 on modern cars. "The other key's at my mum's" is a discount, not an anecdote.
• Old MOT certificates and receipts: each one carries a date and mileage, which is a free audit trail.

When you agree a price, get a receipt naming the car, the reg, the price, and the words "sold as seen" absent if buying from a trader (a trader can't sell away your Consumer Rights Act protection, whatever the receipt says). Pay by bank transfer at the seller's home with the V5C in your hand, do the change of keeper online there and then, and sort insurance before you drive away: the moment you own it, the risk is yours.

None of this takes special knowledge. It takes about an hour, a torch, and the willingness to walk away, which is the one item every checklist agrees on, and the one buyers skip.